In the Dog House

Boy, oh boy did we ever get in trouble last night.

Our parents have a neighbor that has a nickname for us “killers”. My parents talk about it like it’s a bad thing. I’m a hunter! That’s what I’m supposed to do! The neighbor said that he can’t believe that we are hunters, since we love other dogs and people. I’d never bite a person. When we go to the vet we wag our tails when we get shots. We also go every year to visit Santa. See, we’d never bite a person.

See how cute we are? We're good dogs.

I secretly take pride in my capture. As far as my parents know, it’s six squirrels and four opossums, countless lizards, four snakes, and another small furry woodland creature that shall remain nameless. They don’t know that it’s actually much more than that… but please don’t tell them.

So last night after napping all day to have the energy to go hunting, my sister and I were stalking a opossum. This time, she didn’t bark. I guess she read my blog from the other day when I complained that she always ruined the hunting expeditions by barking. Well, we finally got a hold of the opossum. We didn’t really make any noise as we “played” tug of war with it. Somehow my dad figured out that something was going on, came back to investigate and we got SCREAMED at! Dang! I mean it’s our backyard, this thing was on our turf. Well, I let go of the opossum, but my sister still had it in her mouth. My dad grabbed her by the collar and made her let go. I stood there watching it… but then I got hauled back into the house. Then my mom started looking at us, opening our mouths, looking at our paws, she even went through all of our fur. I did have blood on me, but trust me, it wasn’t mine. My sister had a mouth full of fur and slobber. We were alright, I’d never let a opossum get away with biting me.

Well about an hour later my dad came back in the house and said that the opossum’s tail was bleeding, but that it survived. Damn! I thought we had finished it off. My mom was happy.

We spent the rest of the night and this morning apologizing to our parents. We walk over to them, lick, wag our tails and leave. By this morning it looked as if we were forgiven.